I know myself pretty well. When I found out I was going to be a dad the first thing I knew that would be my biggest struggle was patience. I knew you had to be patient with a kid, but there really wasn't a way to prepare myself for how patient I had to be.
It's not that he requires more patience as he's getting older. It's just that I have to be patient for so long. It just never ends.
This really isn't about how I conquered this downfall. I'm far from it. I've noticed that there are a lot of contributing factors. My mood. How my day has gone. He pulls up to the coffee table sweeping drinks off and then crawling in it. I pick him up and move him and by the time I start cleaning that mess up he's making another one somewhere else. Sometimes I'm completely okay with it. Sometimes I'm not.
In my times of weakness I find myself getting frustrated. But why at him? He's 12 months old. I'm the idiot who left my drink in his reach after he has shown that he will knock a drink over everyday.
What's even worse is when I lose my patient pants and Caitlynne, who's at home with him all day, can just take whatever he throws at her. It makes me ask myself constantly: Why is she so much better at this than me?
At least I'm making a conscious effort. I think I'm getter better. At least I hope so.
That's it. What are you waiting for? A conclusion? Nope, I'm a work in progress.
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